The Beginning of the End

2 Sep

It’s the first real weekend of my senior year of college and I already feel like I’m in countdown mode.

This time next year, I won’t be here. We, this surrogate family that I’ve built on this tiny campus, won’t be here. We’ll be spread across the country and the world, and our phone calls and promises of visits will slow down until they eventually dry up for all but a couple of our closest friends. That’s just the way life works.

Right now, it’s still early. I have plans just about every day, because I’ve reached the point where I have enough friends that I actually have multiple groups to hang out with. Plus, it’s the time of year when everyone wants to see each other, plan reunions and that sort of thing.

I feel like the whole vibe of being on campus is somehow different now that we’re seniors. We’ve gone through the make-all-the-friends phase and the only-hang-out-with-five-people phase. Now, we all just want to cherish the time we have left together. I’ve met more new people this week than any other first week of school except freshman year, and for the first time I don’t feel like I’m trying to prove my coolness/worthiness to any of them. We just are who we are, and we’re all in this terrifying last year before adulthood together.

We all already know this year is going to go by way too fast, and we know that it won’t be long before we’re out in the real world with nothing but the memories we’ve made to keep us tied to our time here. For now, we haven’t yet been overwhelmed by school and work, and every one of us is determined to make the most of the time that we have left.

It’s different now, because so many things are “lasts.” The last first day of school. The last set of college housemates. The last Camp Reed. And the farther we get into the year, the more lasts there will be.

I’m so excited to see where life takes me next, takes all of us, but I kind of wish I had just a little more time.

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2 Responses to “The Beginning of the End”

  1. ianmulligan08 July 31, 2013 at 4:02 am #

    This is a really good post. It is something that every senior in college is thinking, but sometimes they don’t want to admit it. We do build a surrogate family and then eventually we go down to just a few friends. People don’t mean to I’m sure it just happens. I was in a lecture on Saipan’s past, present and future. The lecturer Dr. P.F. Kluge remarked that whenever he saw someone he had not seen in ages he wanted to sit down, have a drink, and ask the person how their life turned out. The crazy thing about college is that you never have all those people in the same place again. You can have gatherings and reunions and they are something you cherish. It is at those parties that we nostalgic moments with those people.

  2. Erin September 3, 2012 at 12:41 am #

    Love this entire post

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