Six months!

13 Nov

Well. I graduated from college six months ago today. I walked across that stage (I was so nervous, I actually don’t remember it. I had to go first!) and then I sat around for a few hours and then I went to dinner and spent the evening hanging out with my best friends in the room where most of my freshman-year memories were made, and then, that next morning … I left.

And now I’m here.

Weird how that works. 

In the last six months, I’ve been to three states I hadn’t before (Wyoming, Colorado, North Dakota) and moved somewhere sight-unseen. I’ve gotten a full-time job (and a raise (!!!)). I’ve moved a 13-hour drive from anyone and everyone I care about. I bought a car. I moved into a grown-up apartment. I’ve cried a lot. I’ve challenged myself.

My roommate and I were talking today (because we are both extremely self-reflective people). Here, I’m not depressed, per se, but it hurts. A good hurt, because I feel like I’m growing as a human being, becoming more self-reliant, learning how to be an adult and how to be alone. But also hurting. It’s like, “thanks for all this personal growth but can I be DONE NOW???”

Anyways. I guess it’s good to remember it’s only been six months. And so much has happened and so much will in the next six months it’s absolutely ridiculous – maybe I won’t even be living here six months from now (I probably will). 

So, I’m six months into adulthood. So far it’s hard and lonely and scary. But it’s also cool. To know that there is no next step — no diploma to be obtained, no degree to seek out. The next step is up to me.

It’s just the fact that making your own path means you have to trudge through a lot of shit. So wish me luck.


One Response to “Six months!”

  1. Erin November 21, 2013 at 5:08 pm #

    I’m wishing you lot’s of luck!!!

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