Tag Archives: twenties

Lessons Learned: 2015

1 Jan

This is the only tradition I have surrounding the new year, and I’ve come to really look forward to it every year. Here’s 2011, 2012, 2013, and 2014.

In adulthood, you make your own growth

This year felt weird, in a not-great way, and it took me a while to put my finger on why. Then I realized: for the first time in my life, things haven’t changed. I still have the same job I did a year ago, I live in the same apartment, I hang out with the same people. There haven’t been any major accomplishments this year, just me showing up to work and doing my job and coming home.

It hasn’t been a bad year. There weren’t any tragedies in my personal life, I went on a couple nice trips, it was perfectly serviceable. But nothing happened. My whole life, every new year meant a new grade in school, and 2014 (my first full year graduated) included a couple of major changes. I don’t feel like I grew much in this last year, because you need change for growth. Continue reading

Everything I Write Is Dumb

21 May

On the internet, things last forever. My Facebook posts from 2007? Still there. The posts I started this blog with in 2012? Still there. Thank goodness I wasn’t active on LiveJournal back in 2004, otherwise I’m sure that would still be there too. Every awkward moment of my adolescence, every stupid assumption I made, every youthful complaint about some teenage boy – it’s all online, free for the finding.

People get ripped apart for the smallest thing, these days. People lose their jobs for things they post on social media all the time.

I keep my social media pretty tame: my Facebook and Instagram are very PG, and I very rarely Tweet. But I have this blog. And I try to write things that are real and true about my life – except for that’s really hard to do when you’re terrified not only that your boss could find it, but that, even worse, your boss decades from now could find it. When I’m in my 40s, I’ll surely find everything I write now to be inane, misinformed and annoying. What if some future potential employer pulls up some stupid post I wrote when I was 24 (what if it’s this one???) and then decides to not give me a job? Continue reading

On reacting, deciding, and trying to sort out my future

5 Mar

From April 2013 to September 2014, just about every choice I made was a reaction. I wasn’t getting interviews for the 50-some jobs I applied to, then I was offered a summer internship in a field I wasn’t particularly interested in located in an oil boomtown. I took it, sight-unseen. By the end of the summer, I still hadn’t gotten any of the writing jobs I was applying for, so they offered me employment and I took it. Housing was really expensive there, so when a family with a 3-year-old offered to let me rent a room in their house, I took it and moved in. Four days later, my friend decided to come join me, so I found an apartment and signed a month-to-month lease within 36 hours. Then, within four days we found a cheaper two bedroom and signed a lease on that starting the next month. Continue reading

Why I write about money all the dang time

4 Feb

This weekend, one of my friends “confessed” that he stopped reading my blog because he was tired of reading about my budget. Now, that’s totally fair, not everyone gets the same ridiculous joy from the graphs on Mint as I do.

But they're so pretty!

But they’re so pretty!

The thing is though, I don’t write about my budget to be annoying, or to brag, or to make people feel bad about wherever they stand. I write about it because having control over your finances can buy you some really valuable things: namely freedom and peace of mind. And because these things are not as hard to achieve as you might think they are.

Too many of my peers feel like their money controls them, instead of the other way around. That results in constant stress, skipping out on things they want to do, reaching the end of the month with $5 to their name, and constantly crossing their fingers that the car doesn’t break down.

When my car needs repairs, I am unhappy, because no one enjoys spending $500 to fix their brakes. But, I can pay for it without changing anything about my lifestyle or going into debt, I just replenish my savings account the next month instead of putting money in investments. It’s a ridiculously comfortable feeling. Continue reading

No expectations here, I’m totally chill

3 Feb

Has dating always been like this?

You start getting to know someone, maybe even go on a real date or two, and then it’s just … stuck. We’re afraid of scaring people away by saying something as simple as, “I really dig you, and I don’t want to see other people.”

Asking something of your paramour – as simple as “you should call me more often” – is terrifying, because we’re afraid of being labeled as “desperate” or “clingy” or (and I hate this slang) “thirsty.”

YES. If I’m dating you (and just because we’re for some reason terrified of the word dating and instead stick with “seeing” and “talking to” doesn’t mean dating isn’t what we’re doing) I want you to call me. I want you to make plans with me. I want to be completely confident that you actually enjoy spending time with me – and if that makes me clingy, then I will wear that label with pride. Continue reading

My nowhere-near-perfect super-great apartment

31 Jan

When I’m in a waiting room of any sort, the first magazines I’ll pick up are about home decorating. I spend a lot of time perusing Apartment Therapy. When I’m home, and have access to cable, I watch HGTV.

But I’m a renter who does not have piles of money to spend on redecorating an apartment that I probably won’t even live in for that long. I love having a home that makes me happy and comfortable, and I especially love not spending thousands of dollars to get it that way. So hello, The Internet, and here is a little photo tour of my lovely post-college apartment (okay, it’s my 4th apartment post-college, but I only graduated 19 months ago, so it counts).

Also, this post is super long. Just a warning.

IMG_1974

When I first visited this apartment and saw the wood floors and built in shelves around the (non-functional) fireplace, plus the fact that it was in my price range, I knew I wanted to move in here. The layout of the living room is kinda awkward, with doors on three walls and the fireplace on the fourth, so furniture placement was tough but I’m fairly happy with how it’s set up.  Continue reading

Picking a future

26 Jan

I wrote a few days ago about the freedom that comes with being graduated – namely, that you get to make your own choices now. However, as with all freedoms, that freedom comes with great responsibility – and outright terror.

I can already feel time slipping away – I’ll be 24 in March. That’s too old to be young and stupid. Heck, when my mom was 24, she was a mom! And as I realize I’m already in my mid-twenties, I can’t help but freak out about all my hopes and dreams, and trying to figure out which ones I really want.

Part of me wants the whole domestic shebang – marriage and kids and a cute little house and the PTA (and of course, I’d have to do the whole finding-a-dude thing, which is easier said than done). Part of me wants to be a nomad, living out of a suitcase (which involves figuring out a way to earn money whilst not being tied to an office, also easier said than done). Part of me wants a high-powered career (and I’m also not entirely sure what that would look like or how to get there). I’m drawn to living in a big city, with a ton going on, and also to a small town, where you run into friends at the grocery store. Continue reading